ASHLEY

So I have been in Berlin for almost 5 months now. Why? Well that's sort of a funny question because I don't have such a specific answer. But maybe that is exactly the point. It almost seems as though I sort of randomly wound up here. Not ready to commit to some career oriented job yet perhaps, and unable to afford to do so anywhere else but here. Of course I could go in the middle of nowhere in the states and afford to be there, but in Berlin I can have enough money to live while also being in a metropolitan city where I am constantly stimulated by my environment. If I went somewhere else that I could have enough money to live then I certainly would not be inspired by my community. In Berlin people don't have to work nearly as much as they do in New York which lends the people time to be able to get involved in interesting projects. And why is this? A big reason (as with everything else) is MONEY, specifically the dramatic difference in rent prices. In Berlin it is easier to be an 'artist' because you don't have to taint your work nearly as much to become a money maker. One can work on whatever she or he wants to without being so concerned with its marketability, and that is because time is money in New York. You have less time because you need more money in New York simply to survive. As an American college graduate, not only do I have to be able to pay the standard bills (rent, gas, electric, phone, transportation, etc.) but also I must pay off the exorbitant amount of debt most Americans are doomed to after finishing university--student loans.

New York is very career based. At the end of my college career I remember finding myself quite stressed out by my peers. Everyone was constantly talking about this and that internship and applying for this and that company. It's a 'catch 22' system however (although I think this is everywhere) that you need to first have a bunch of unpaid internships too one day land a good job. However, if you are someone like myself taking 18 credits of courses a semester to get as much as I can for the 40,000 dollars a year college costs, who then needs to also make money to buy food, art supplies, books and of course fun nights out, then you need some sort of retail or waitressing job to have some incoming money. So you don't have time for unpaid internships unless you come from a wealthy family who is able to provide for you. So the wealthier people still get the better jobs. It is a vicious cycle.

Now don't get me wrong. I love New York, and I think there is still a lot of good left in the city and great opportunity. I wouldn't trade my having my college experience there for anything. going to university there as opposed to any typical college in America definitely matured me much faster than other people I grew up with. It is still a culturally rich city with all sorts of people in it. It is just expensive! !

But how did I exactly wind up in Berlin. Well as I said before it was sort of a random but perfect decision. Two years ago after studying a semester in Paris (another city too expensive for it's own good), my best friend came to visit me (Jess), and together with 2 other people we all backpacked for a month throughout europe. One of these places was Berlin. We really liked the city (for those 3-4 days we were here). I especially fell in love with the dark, deteriorating buildings I saw, and the shanty-town playgrounds I saw. Jess who hadn't studied abroad in college decided that she was going to move berlin from that point on. In our last year of University (different Universities but both art schools in Manhattan--Jess: School of Visual Arts, Me: New York University), Jess told everyone that she was going to move to Berlin after she graduated. One frigid January evening in Brooklyn when Jess and I were outside Subway bar talking about our current lives. And I say to her, "What am I going to do without you when you move to Berlin?" She says, "What am I going to do without you? ....Why don't you just come with me?" And then I just say ....Yeah OK. And that was that. From that point on I also was going to Berlin, and we just made it happen. Ever since I have spent my time here learning so much about cultural differences and most importantly myself. I needed time to figure myself out, and what better way then to throw myself into a situation where I am constantly a bit out of my comfort zone. A place I had to create a new life more myself with new friends, new ways to make money, new culture, and naturally a new language. I am constant in a life reflection while here.